Can one friend fill all our pockets?

Not likely.

As a woman who has moved many times and become accustomed to having to mix in many circles to fill my many pockets, I’ve learned that different friends support different needs.

Depending on which pocket of mine is empty or overflowing, determines which friend I call up or doorstep I land on.

We all have that sex friend (no, that is not a friend you have sex with). It’s the friend that when you catch up you can both freely deep dive into the intricacies and secrets of your sexual insecurities, past embarrassments and future curiosities. You share stories and laugh or find guidance in their experiences, as they do yours.

Not all our friends are this friend.

There are the mental health friends. The ones you spew out all of your emotions on because they know your history, they have seen your darkness and they recognise the pain inside you. They might be the friends who have also experienced the heaviness of waking up, or perhaps not. Perhaps they hold space for you because they don’t understand it at all, but their openness and acceptance allows you to let your guard down.

Not all our friends are this friend.

Lets not forget the mum friends. The mum friends are the pocket you fill with all of your both wise and whiny mum life needs. They can relate and hate right along side you. They laugh and love and top up your wine glass. They meet you at all the parks and understand what it means to sit in silence, because neither of you have anything to talk about, and neither of you want to talk about your children.

Not all our friends are this friend.

What about our business bestie’s, the friends that cheer you on in your side hustle space. These are the friends that scoop up your questions and use their entrepreneurial skills and savvy hacks to keep you motivated on your journey. They celebrate your highs and they help work out your lows.

Not all our friends are this friend.

The work friends; the only ones that truly understand the pure hatred you have for a certain role, process, system or human in the workplace. The friends that make you laugh so hard but also when they have a day off, you bury yourself in a cone of silence until their return.

Some of our friends are all of these things (rarely) but other’s are that specific friend: the one that holds space for us in a specific capacity.

The positive to this, is that it results in having many friends.

Know your friends.

Know what pocket they keep warm.

Know the space that you hold for them.

T x

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